Worship

When we praise and worship God during service, it is not just lifting up our hands and sing according to the lyrics formed on the screen. Rather, the true meaning of worshipping God is really dwelling into a new realm, meditating His name, reviewing the good works that he had done in our life.. I thank God for spending his precious time on me, focusing on my life path and helping me when I'm struggling through hard times.. Indeed, God is a great God.. A person like me who doesn't know how to describe and exaggerate out my feeling can only express out through Praise and Worship.. I can honestly tell U that during each and every service, i respected and stayed 100% focus onto God.. This is the only time I can feel his presence strongly.. I don't know about U guys out there, but i know myself that I'm as equally important as a flesh blood child of he's..I regarded him as my Abba, and never will there be a situation whereby totally forgiven about him and his greatness.. Love Him So Much!!

I have deeply reflected for my own future.. I know right now, we must get started already.. In study wise, though there some set backs in the past, i knew that i can still move on successfully and it will come to pass.. I knew that whenever I'm alone, Jesus is always sitting beside me. Like an Guardian Angel, he watches me the whole day and make sure everything goes systematically. I just love the way how He plans for me, how every steps that he had guided me through.. He accompanied me through hardships, happiness and sorrows.. Even when i was about to fall asleep in class, he snapped his finger and woke me up..Cool huh?^^

All in all, i felt that He's the only one that is 100% trustworthy.. He didn't lie to me, He didn't cheat my feeling like other people did and most of all He loves me.. I love Him too..(''v'')(''v'')

Signing Off,
VanTaSha
(28/02/07)


Accomplishment..

In order to succeed in life, we have to really plan out what we want to be and where will we stand 10 years down the road.. I know myself very well where I'm heading to.. Recently, I took back several test paper.. I felt very disappointed and hated myself for not putting enough effort during revision time..

right now, I'm standing in this condition whereby it's either I put in extra more efforts in studies or just heck care about it.. Obviously, I wont ignore my studies and none of us will coz we have a vision, that is to Pass and Promote to next level.. But I just can't get hold of myself.. Due to some changes of time, the air condition has be swtiched on from 8.30am onwards.. This means that the class is getting more comfortable and cooling... And because of this, I felt more and more lethargic in class.. I am a person who can only study in normal room temperture, no distraction, peace and quiet condition.. Gosh, how am i suppose to stay focus in lesson now? ..sighz..-.-"

DURING MATH LESSON, I ALMOST FELL ASLEEP IN CLASS!! *sob sob* I wanna cry liao.. I missed out bits and pieces of info from this new topic that has taught today.. Sad case.. Can anyone reteach that topic again? >.<"

People out there! I need suggestions on HOW TO STAY AWAKE DURING LESSONS.. Please tag it on the chat box.. Will appreciate it loads..Thank U..

anyway, God has a purpose in us.. even though sometimes things just don't follow accordingly, i believe we are allocated to another better alternatives.. So place your trust in God that with Him, Nothing Is Impossible. Yeah, your day will be great according to what He has planned..Thank God for such arrangement..^^

Alright then, now is 2.20am. it's getting late now..everyone of us should go to sleep and so am I.. Gd Night..

Signing Off,
VanTaSha
(27/02/07)


Sorry everyone, is it ok if i take back my words? i know i've written something which i'm not supposed to.. Sorry la.. Promise, there wont be next time, ok? i'm back!! ^^

though there is a limit of my writing skills, i'll try to write as much details as i can.. not to miss out anything today, i spent most of my time in school, studying, revising schoolwork.. i have also learnt new topics from physics and math.. Cool!! finally, i'm out from recapping past topics and moved on!!Yeah..so excited to learn new things, especially during math lessons.. People out there, Math does not make U mad,ok? it's so enjoyable.. sometimes u got to start loving your most detested subject in order to master it..if really cannot, like what my teacher said, "Just pretend U like it la!!"..

that's all for today..having sore throats now..not in the mood to write much..i shall continue on the next entry..

Signing Off,
VanTaSha
(26/02/07)


Deeply In Love
By Hillsong United

In my life You`ve heard me say
I love You
How do I show You it`s true
hear my heart, it longs for more of You..
I`ve fallen deeply in love with You..

You have stolen my heart
I`m captivated by You
Never will you and I part
I`ve fallen deeply in love with You

You and I, together forever
Nothing can, stand in the way
My love for You, grows stronger
each new day.
I`ve fallen deeply in love with You

You have stolen my heart
I`m captivated by You
Never will you and I part
I`ve fallen deeply in love with You

Jesus, you've stolen my heart
I`m captivated by You
Never will you and I part
I`ve fallen deeply in love with You


Today wasn't so bad.. I felt that the bonding with new members are getting stronger.. isn't it wonderful? Praise God for the great work that he've done in me.. As i was reading one of friend's blog entry, i felt very... no words can describe the feelings now..don't worry, nothing serious happened, just that i really can't think of any words.. i'm deteriorating now.. how? sighz.. how sad..

i saw him today after service.. kind of disappointed,sad but yet with abit of hatred.. i don't know what's wrong with me now.. i'm going berserk..going insane, going crazy..alright, i'm a freak, mad girl..pls ignore me.. you'll find that i'm silly, childish.. but this is what i felt, what can you do? i cannot express myself out, or should i say, i don't know how to express out.. that's why i don't like to share my matter with you.. i'm getting sick of blogging already..i just wanna live in my world alone..

You guyz happily enjoy blogging, hanging around, making friends..Leave me alone.. i wanna focus on my own stuff..don't ever think that u have the capability to interfere, to understand me.. In fact, you have not even knew my true identity..so i don't wish to add more burdens into your life..Move On! i'd prefer to complete the race with Jesus only..

Signing Off (leaving for a long term break),
VanTaSha
(25/02/07)


My oh my.. I'm in a chaotic world now.. Lots of thinking to be thought.. Lots of decisions to make.. Lots of unbearable matters to let go.. Building up courage to pick up new things, new matter, new environment, new society, new people.. How i wish time could stop just right now, NOW i mean!.. Nothing to worry about, nothing to fear about, heck care of everything and live an eternal world with Jesus.. That's all i want.. hmmz..

Nowadays, I'm getting more and more blur.. I just couldn't absorb what the teachers has taught us.. I began to feel depressed.. Fears are filling all over me and sometimes you could even see me staring blankly in the space.. This shouldn't be the way,right? But but.. Guess my brain is not functioning at the right time.. This particular song kept on running through my mind over and over again.. Somehow, I got hook onto it already.. As I was recalling this music, I thought of him.. That shouldn't be the way coz 'Hello, come on, why am i putting so much attention on him?' Does this prove that I've fallen in love for him? Cannot be and it SHOULDN'T be at this crucial year.. But it's irresistible.. His image kept on flashing through my thoughts.. I'm like avoiding this person in MSN, so as to 'unfulfill' this weird thoughts..

I am is what I am and for what I am, i shall stand up on my feet again.. Together with the guidance of Holy Spirit, I shall move on.. No Distraction for me, U devil! I had enough of it...


Prayer:
Holy Spirit, guide me through this crucial period, allowing me to make a rightful decision and cast away all the temptations that I'm facing now in Jesus Mighty Name.. Give me the Strength to stay awake in lessons and mould me into an alert and righteous person.. Oh Lord, I desires more of You and less of me.. I give You my all in exchange of a renewed mind.. Oh Lord, clothed me with protection, shields and armors to fight the spiritual war against devil.. I love You so much, by your grace, everything shall be done in a systematic and orderly manner.. In Jesus Mighty name i prayed, Amen...


Gong Xi Fa Cai...He Jia Huan Qing!!:)

A Happy day is a day we spent with our families.. Never to miss out the relatives, they've never failed to build up the quiet atmosphere.. Although this year's new year was kinda special, but nonetheless, I still received lots of red packets.. As for the amount wise, I shall not reveal but I felt that it's still not enough to fulfil my building fund, wishing list and necessary stuff..Oh Lord, I pray that tomorrow will be a great day and more blessings may fall upon me..(:

Anyway, a few more hours later, I will be going down to my granny's place.. sighz.. So sian, later I'll be facing the "machine gun" again.. I just don't get it, why are there such people exist in this world? Why do they have the ability to talk so much, the 'Non-stop Hitz' i called it.. Worse still, I don't even understand a single word of Cantonese.. Sad case right? Don't worry, I'm picking up already.. I started off with some CNY greeting phrases such as Gong Xi Fa Cai, Wan Shi Ru Yi & Sheng Ti Jian Kang...(Cantonese language) If not, my ang mo's language they don't understand..

Just this afternoon, I was chatting with my ex-cg member... We talked about his love life.. How he get attracted to that girl and how the relationship ended.. I felt very sad for him.. Honestly speaking, he's a great person, a fine, young gentlemen.. Too bad that lady doesn't know how to appreciate him... He's turning 23 this year,if I'm not wrong..
PS:Ladies out there, if you are interested to make friends with him, pls tell me.. I'll make arrangement for U...^^

Gosh, Right now is 3.44am.. I started feeling abit sick now.. Don't know what's wrong with me.. maybe I've caught a flu.. Everybody's sleeping now except one or two who are tonning over night, just like me.. I felt very grateful to know some new friends out there.. Lest I'm not always talking to the same person.. It's time to step out from my comfort zone and move on... but but.. I'd still need to improve on my language.. It's going to be a tough journey.. Sighz..

"...Everyday, every night, I am missing U.." Upon hearing this song right now, I thought of Him..I wonder how is he doing now after ORD... How's his part time job going on.. How's his life going on.. How's everything..

Good Bye...

Signing Off,
VanTaSha
(19/02/07)

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
2:55 AM

Saturday, February 17, 2007

*Cough Cough Cough*...

My goodness..I really cannot stand the choking smell of joss stick and burnt paper.. Whenever it comes to new year eve or some other occasions, many people will start burning all sorts of offerings.. Honestly speaking, i don't like it.. Every morning's joss stick smoke is terribly enough for me.. Now,they even burn MORE offerings..AIR POLLUTION!!..















Anyway, today is Chinese New Year eve..I guess most of us are ready for reunion dinner later on,ya? Cool, I'm gonna have mine too.. For me, it's like once in a year kinda occasion coz i don't really eat together with my family.. I find it weird,don't u think so? I would prefer to eat alone or with other friend..yup..











Gd news..one of my friend scored excellent results for his exam..Praise God! Congrats manz! Continue to excel and you shall succeed in life.. Jia You!! I also sense that blessings is coming soon... Hurray! So happy today.. :D










Thursday was my CNY performance.. Finally, it was successfully done.. All thanks to my classmate..no interruption,no disagreement, everything went on smoothly..Gosh, we are so united.. I just love them so much..Muackz.. :D

Friday was my cross country run at Japanese Garden.. Though it's a new place, nonetheless, everything went smoothly.. No one was lost.. hehe.. After which, I got the privilege to visit my friend's house and she did manicure treatment for me..It's free-of-charge by the way..Thankz Ah Jas..i like her design and unique style..Indeed, she's an authentic art student..Love Ya!! :]











I have no idea why I'm so happy today... I think because of something that have happened few days ago.. ^^*


Signing Off,
VanTaSha
(17/02/07)

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
2:30 PM

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Well well well, first of all, i'll like to wish everyone out there a Happy Valentine Day... Actually I myself have nothing to write about for this post coz whatever I wanted say, you can find from my friend's entries.. For me, I didn't really get to celebrate my V.day with the loved ones but I did celebrated with my classmate, form teacher and other subject teacher in school.. This year's V.day would be the most memorable day I ever had.. Ms Goh is such a sweet and caring person.. We were told to go back to our class before our lesson starts.. Guess what, she gave each of us a nicely wrapped green apple.. So unique, so cool, so touching.. All of us was like "aWwWw...so sWeeT.." In return, we managed to get someone of our classmate to rush down to JP and they've bought an ice cream cake from swensen... It's a mocha flavor ice cream cake.. Though the cake wasn't that big for everyone to eat, we managed to share and i only took a bite..It tasted so sweet..

Anyway, like what i've told jasmine, one of my good buddy, "In this world, only Tan Boon Cheng could brighten up my day... Coz under any circumstances, he'll always put on a smiley faces.. So warm, so sweet, so CuTe~.." By the way, Tan Boon Cheng is my Physics teacher.. Not knowing when, I started to have interest in that subject already..^^*

I was told that in a mutual situation, there isn't a need for guyz to make the first move if they are wooing galz.. Is it true? I don't know, but if both party are close friends, there is a high possibility of getting into a relationship..Is it true? Or some of us believe in Love At First Sight? Just a short recap, when is the first time u having crush on someone? When is your first date? when are all your first time experience? Do you still remember or you've forgotten everything coz you have 'experienced' too much in relationship,can't remember? As for me, I still remembered my first crush and he'll always remain in my heart..(''V'')("V")

Signing Off,
VanTaSha
(14/02/07)

Labels: Happy Valentine Day

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
1:59 AM

Saturday, February 10, 2007

i had a dream last night..til now,i still cant forget about that dream..dont worry,it's something good..I dreamt that 2 person blessed me with 25 thousand dollar..hehehez..God has given me such dream, which means somehow i'll be financially blessed this few days..so happy..cant wait for that moment to come coz currently having some financial crisis..so i wish the blessings would come right now, this time!..=]

now is 5.46pm...later on,i'll be going out with my family for a reunion dinner together with my granny..sighz, another boring session..how i wish time fly faster for this weekend..just dont know why,i have an urge to go back to school right away!maybe coz i misses so much of my classmate and my cutie form teacher..hehez..oh ya!i had my flagday at chua chu kang this morning..though i've yet to fill the whole tin,at least i done my part..not like other people,so slack and collected so small amount of $$...

Signing Off,
VaNtaSha...
(10.02.07)

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
5:39 PM

Reflections (09/02/07)
Today we, the sec 5, were told to stay back in school to witness the release of 'O' level results..Sadly, our 2006 batch of 'O' lvl students did very badly.. Our percentage of english passes is 54.4%,which is lower than the national average..Mrs Chow was very disappointed.. So, here comes a question, is it the students' fault or the teachers' fault that causes such poor results? During recess, my friends and i got a chance to talk to my english teacher. As we were discussing about how to improve in our english language, she confidently she said that if only we, as a student, has the heart to really focus and concentrate during lesson and to also adpat her teaching style,we'll sure passes or even have the chances to get distinction..Ms karasi was the first teacher i've ever met with such a high confident level..it's as if we'll sure get distinction even for those who are very weak in english..i dont know but it MAY come true..After all,she's the Head Of English Department,having long periods of experiences in education...Honestly,i do really believe her that she has her way to improve me.. I placed my trust on her.. Whatever she's doing now, it's all for our own good and i dont think she wants the history to repeat itself for the coming year..

Similarly,God is just like our teacher..He teaches new skills,improve us,challenge us and so on..besides this,God is also concern about our performance..He loves us and whenever troubles strikes, he will always stay by your side and work together with you..i felt very grateful to have such good buddy with me..He's incompetable and irreplacable..He's the one and only unique person that i've met..Thank U..

When we talks about relationships,what is the first thing that comes out of your mind?Your current partner that you are dating now or your ex-stead?many of us experienced several times of relationship,but may i post a question to you,which one is really your true love?You yourself knows the best but for my opinion, i felt that it's either the person that you stead with or none...why none?coz since u've experienced so much love from others, u'll tend to confused and ended up in a bias decision..so choose your partner carfully,as i believe that this person will accompany you through thicks and thins throughout your whole life..All the Best!

In study wise,we must excel and work hard..God gave me a sentence when i was bathing..."Despite having hatred and competitions in your life,why not refresh everything and start anew life?"..it sets my mind pondering "maybe i should stopped the mindcept of competing with that F.T and work with no influence by the surrounding area.."well,maybe i should..I believe,with God's surpport, i'll put it through all the obstacles and fulfil my goals..God is everything to me now..I will not left him out, neither will i forget about Him..

Labels: Fruitful Journey

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
2:35 AM

Friday, February 09, 2007

Everyday, i live a life of competition. I've always wanted to strive for the best and make myself well-known enough among the class. Each day, I'm always competing with that F.T(mentally), be it in areas of studies or other activites.. Honestly speaking, it is not a challenge anymore, instead, that F.T becomes a threat to me.. Each day, I've always thought of nasty ways on how to beat that F.T down.. It seems like i'm leading my life everyday by the devil.. Jealousy, hatred, anger and so on.. But to think again, isn't what God wanted us to progress in studies, get top in class and make a difference? I'm confused... Right now, there's only 1 thing that flows in my mind, "next test,i must do better than F.T, beat him down, prove him that he's not the only outstanding elite in class..I CAN DO SO TOO!!.." Am i really on the right track? Do i need to change my perception? Or shall i just continue with this mentality in order for me to reach my goals? I have no idea...God, pls tell me what am I suppose to do..

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
1:56 AM

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

EL Petition matter::
Right now, i felt that we are going againist the will..Should i join in the crowd or wash my hands off? I wanted to ignore everything but can't. i don't wish to get involve into this matter but i can't. After all, which class am i belongs to and which ENG lesson am i attending to? It's an obvious answer. It is as though we are starting a battle with karasi. The percentage of winning is very low, whereas, if we were to *heng heng* win the battle,we'll end up in a losing stage too..i heard that if we are able to convince the principal to change an english teacher, we'll have a relief teacher instead, which doesnt benefits us either.. If u were to choose,which one do u want? An english HOD educator or a relief teacher?common sense tells u that it should be the HOD,right? Honestly speaking, I have no disagreement on karasi but just only that she's always late,that's all. I believe she can improve on her timing. Even though her lesson is abit bored, but like what ah jas has already said, we can't always have games and group discussion all the time. We also have to settle down for serious work already. I don't wish to fail my english and I don't wish many teachers and pupils to get involve. Best if we can talk things out,settle everything in a peaceful manner and really get down to serious revision.. That's all i want..

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
12:36 AM

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Let This Be My Prayer
Dear god,i thank for this time today..though i've been through quite alot of disheartening matters and even wanted to give up after realising that i've failed almost all the papers, i believe if i'm less sensitive towards people who are proud and arogant maybe i'll still survive..God, i knew that you've putt them into my life as form of challenge and this obstacles, i believe you wanted me to fight against it and win the battle.. all this are meant to be good for me,i thank U for all that u've done..
I prayed that u could give me strength to survive each and every single day. as time goes by, each day is a new challenge for me and i believe if God wanted to mould me into a better and successful person, the obstacles that i'm facing would be tougher and tougher.. but nevertheless,all this are to groom me for the coming years..Thank U for all the effort that u've put in to me..i'll never ever forget U and u'll always remain in my heart forever..Amen..(:

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
1:08 AM

Bitching Session..
I know it's not rightful for me to write such a post, but i just can't help it. Just treat me as though i'm bitching anyway. I have no idea what's going on today. once again, i got very fed up. Why? it's all because of that forgein talent again!! i had enough of him! i know Devil is trying to tease me today, but i just can't take it anyone.. i know he has his personal tuition, that's why he impoved tremendously..whatever test papers we took, he's always the top scorer.. so what?He is very arrogant!!STOP IT MANz!!

Tan boon cheng has really disappointed me today..come on la, as a teacher, shouldn't it be him doing the teaching? why does it turn out to be that F.T teaching us? He's not doing his part as an educator,OK?! "Oh..Pls refer to B.X..PLS REFER TO B.X!! PLS REFER TO B.X!!.." enough is enough! if you are tired, you can always go through some other time, you dont need to make us turn to B.X for answers.. Excuse me, if i'm not wrong, you are the setter for this paper,right? why can't you just go through the correction for the paper and end off the day? everything always "PLS REFER TO B.X...PLS REFER TO B.X.." Big Deal is it?DAMN IT!!

Labels: bloody hell idiot

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
12:27 AM

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Peace, At Last

I was self sufficient,

Gratified by my independence,

Alone, but not lonely,

I thought.
But I was restless,

Searching for something to fill an empty place.

I didn't even know I had,

Dimly aware

That I was somehow unfinished.

Then YOU came,

And filled everything,

Every space, every need,

every secret dreams

I had concealed from myself.

I was self sufficient,

and restless;

And i was profundly peaceful and complete,

Because of YOU...

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
8:34 PM

Friday, February 02, 2007

Do you know sometimes it does really hurt me whenever i view your* blog? First thing that i saw is always a photo of you* and your girlfriend*. I wont deny that she is beautiful, as a matter of fact, she IS really young and pretty.. My friend* is blessed to have such wonderful lady in his life.. I really hope that by the works of God and also encouragement from her, he* will stand strong and succeed in his life..

Riots!! 5B is going to rebel anytime in coming monday.. Actually, I'm still alright with Ms karasi but just only 1 thing that I dont really like about her.. She's always late.. I think she can further improve on that.. So what if she is the Head of English Department? After all, she is still an educator. Students are not suppose be late for lessons, same applies to teacher too.. How many of us do realised that time is really very precious? You cant rewind nor fast forward... Clock's ticking.. So i would suggest that if we could stop fooling round and really get down into serious work.. Am i right?

I have no idea what's going on with me nowadays.. Suddenly recalled back some happy memories but in split seconds time, I recalled another issue.. Surprisingly, I can even cry on the spot but I held back my tears.. What is wrong with me? Have i fall into that deep valley again? I hope I'm wrong.. [frenz out there, do pray for me..i am already getting started to dehydrate spiritually...]

Last but not least, to round up today's post,I'll like extract a qoutation from this person, Ernest Dimnet, "The Happiness of most people is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slowly destructive things."[=


*(prefered not to disclosed..)

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
9:13 PM

Thursday, February 01, 2007

This afternoon,i got very fed up..i was insulted by someone directly in front of all my classmate..(chose not to reveal this person..) Damn It!! He's just too much... How could he? Even though what u said was true but u dont need to say out so loud,right? It's just bull s*** la... I've never ever expected such words coming out from your mouth.. U damn idiot.. U yourself is also one of it, so pls dont even bother to say such thing out lor... what the~... And til now, I'M STILL WAITING FOR AN APOLOGY...

Enough is enough, I'm done with it already.. I'm just freaking sick of who I am now after that comment made.. It's time for me to also embark an embarrassment project.. Damn it la.. I made a pact with someone out there..i told her "Come on,let's go on **** during CNY and we shall see whether will there be any changes after that.." I'm really going all out for it already.. I had enough of those discriminating eyes looking upon me..! It's time for me to make a big change..U shall wait and see!! Damn It!

Labels: Damn It

人之初性本善..("v")("v")
1:48 AM