Apparently, I've, once again, screwed up my day... !>.<


*beep beep beep*... " You're Alpha IC. " --> Time: 9++am. Date: 31th Jan 09

What have I done wrong?

1. Preparation of briefing notes

Thank God for crist's smart idea, Zone Briefing Notes Template. As soon as I received my allocation, I quickly referred to the template for help. Thank God that most of the important pointers are recorded down. However, I believe that there are more to add on and it shall be as detailed as possible so that misterpretation/ assumption can reach to its minimum.

2. Support

Everything went positive... We did more than enough... We completed our service quantity in 45min and even did half for Sunday's service... *Pad Pad on layhwa's shoulder* Well done... :)

3. Briefing to Alpha Ushers

I assumed that I've read out all the pointers to take note of in my briefing notes. Perhaps i was my fault that i did not empathsize certain very important elements such as Offering sequences, the responsibility implanted to us, the accountability aftermath, insipirational motivation to Alpha usher etc...

4. Allocations for Alpha Usher

I did ask them whether if anybody is serving Alpha the first time. I could have missed out other importants questions beside first time serving... My fault for been stumbled at that moment. *Head aches... *

5. Offering Buckets

A2 (13 Buckets)
I think that panic has stroke me at the back of my dumb dumb brain... After collecting A2 first row, I eventually thought that I'm still a zone usher and happily collected A2 bucket. Worse still, I feel that sometimes when I panic, I couldn't think properly... On my left ear, congregation called out for me to collect buckets. On the right ear, my beloved security brother kept pinpointing which buckets has yet to be collected. And my 2eyes are literately staring at Koong Fai.. *SOS signal* After so much confusion and also due to time contrain, I brought up whatever bucket that is on hand without counting it. By the time when I reach OCP 2, I've got 10 buckets only.. Youmei took 1 bucket. Ben came in with 1 bucket.. so..
10+1+1=12??? Where is another 1? Shit!!!!!!! Sound console...!! >.< " I'm so scared now.. I think my buckets doesn't tally... "

6. Mental preparation

I should've prayed before hand... I turned up unprepared. So, what makes you think that your ushers would do well when their IC cannot even get a hold of themselves? It doesn't make sense, right?

*Alright, this is my self-reflection on today's duty. I felt that I've done bad. I've not live up to the level of excellence and should deserve all disciplining.

Just a minute ago, I paused myself from thinking and realized that the reason why my pathetic mind has been so congestive these days...
I think i'm suffering from massive migraines.... to the extent that I don't even know. To the extent that the pain has numbed my brain to stop me from thinking approperiately temporarily.


I need resolution. I need medication.... Any one? Please help me... I'm dying...


"The workers who are returning home to tell their husbands and wives and children that they no longer have a job, and all those who live in fear that their job will be next on the cutting blocks, they need help now." Barack Obama said.


不值得
歌手：阿强
专辑：此情可待

除了想你除了爱你
hu ~我什么什么都愿意
翻开日记整理心情
hu ~我真的真的想放弃
你始终没有爱过
你在敷衍我
一次一次忽略我的感受
我真的感到力不从心
无力继续
这感情不值得我犹豫
不值得我考虑
不值得我爱过你
这种回忆不值得我提起
不值得想起 不值得哭泣
ha~这段感情早就应该放弃
早就不该让我浪费时间找奇迹
这样的你不值得我恨你
不值得我为你而坏了心情
ha~我决定不为你而毁了心
放弃爱你

[白]我决定:放弃你


bu zhi de - Dreamz FM


Since i'm having break in school now, let's talk about what we've done yesterday...

Yesterday was yet another normal school day for me. However, in the midst of mandune routine, I realised that this week shall be the last moment I'm going to spend with my classmates. Thinking back of how I depart away from my last semester's buddy, I still feel that this bunch of people I'm hanging out with is much better. :) I simply love playing and joking with them..

Despite the fact that guys are always guys and that they are vulgar, somehow in a way or another, I wouldn't mind. Because of their silliness, it brings joy and live to W34L. :D

Anyway, 1 more day to my holiday... I should be rejoicing but just don't know why my frown suddenly reveal... Worried about what?? I also don't know... Perhaps I'm still doing up my holiday plan so that it will not gone to waste like it was back in Nov-Dec2007.

Should I go find a part-time job? If I were to find one, which one should I sign up for? An admin position in office? A waitress in restuant? I don't mind... A factory worker/packer? I heard from the agent that there isn't any vacanies for us, especially women.. What the heck....-.-"
*If you have any job opportunity, please contact me!! Urgent!! Thanks!! ^-^

Anyway, I'm going off to watch my movie now.. Oh yea, Thanks Joshi for sending me lots of movie so that I can watch and kill time.. But where's my Ponyo Ponyo Ponyo??? I'm still waiting!!! >.<

Ciaos~ Sweet love to all! ("V")("V')


haha... Don't know what's going on... These days I've been feeling sleepy... think I know the reason why... It's all Lee Bum Soo's fault!!! heeheee...
But anyway, I've successfully watched finished my Korean drama series and was highly motivated to take up Korean language.
Anybody knows where to register for korean lessons? Please contact me or tag on board.. Thanks! ^-^

These days I've been thinking alot. And for the first time after a long period of break, i prayed to God. I told God that I don't want to care any more. I just to spend as much time with my loved ones as possible. Day by day, seeing them aging, health deteriorating, i couldn't do anything much but to cry. Sometimes I felt abit useless in somebody's eye to the extent that I couldn't even face him while talking. To see them suffering from illnesses is equivalent to stabbing my heart. I don't know what I'm trying to say but all I want is to just love and cherish them to the end.


"I promise that I will not force you to accept whatever thing you don't like. You may live your life in full control. You may do whatever you want... with 1 condition, please promise me that you would protect your health and stop inflicting pain... I don't want to lose you because I care for you..."


Alright, it's 12.55 am now. I guess all of us has received their O level results.... Some cried, not the tears of joy but.... Some rejoice for hard work! Anyway, I just wanna congratulate ALL O level students and private candidate for pulling through until the end. I understand that certain results may not be came out as what you were aiming for, DON'T BE DISHEARTEN!! There are still other choices available for you.








At last, My brother finally returned me my lap top! Thanks ah...

Anyway, before hitting the sack tonight, I thought maybe I should blog something. To be honest, lots of things actually happened these days but I didn't managed to blog it. Sorry about that, it was either I am too tired or too lazy to do so. However, every events does create an impact in my heart,at least it triggers a tick on my heart, I can feel it...

Just a minute ago, I happened to browse some of my friend's photo. It seemed like it was all taken from a group event which i think I should be in the photo. However, I just don't know why my face wasn't there. It puzzled me and I took a while to spare a thought...

Ever since I'm attached, my whole life has 180 degree changed. Thank God for blessing me a partner whom I can turn to when I'm feeling low. A veyr good supporter and lovely, caring man...

All things has gone well... Too well that sometimes I feel that if i look at another angle, it can become a boundary, a restriction which i've chosen to bind myself from... It's hard to dechiper my thoughts, if you can understand that sentence, Congratulations! You can read my mind...

In life, there are many angles we can view from a situation. Some angle can give us the optimum view we desire to aim,however, you would also,at the same time, discover some angle which are badly produced. You hardly can see any hope for such an angle to produce light. And tentatively, it will be eliminated. How sad...

It's hard to accept the fact that you got to hit a breakeven in every situation in life. Don't forget,there's grey spot. Can you spot it?

Standing in the middle of the lever can be of 2 outcome; you are save from falling or you are at risk if you make any move. So how? We can't just sit there and do nothing, right? We'll die of starvation/boredom/dehydration/sickness/mentally disorder... Whatever you can think of...

Just imgaine Person A carrying bags of worries, sorrows, stresses, unhappiness and disappointment. When he makes a move, the possibility of getting him down straight to the ground is relatively high. He's gonna kill himself. However, Person B carrying bags of happiness and hope will have the possibility to sustain on the panel... Which type of person would you wanna be? A or B? I don't know....



Shout To The Lord - Hillsong



My Jesus, My Savior
Lord there is none like You
All of my days
I want to praise
The wonders of Your mighty love

My Comfort, My Shelter
Tower of refuge and strength
Let every breath
And all that I am
Never cease to worship You

Shout to the Lord
All the earth
Let us sing
Power and majesty
Praise to the King
Mountains bow down
And the seas will roar
At the sound of Your Name

I sing for joy at the work of Your hands
Forever I'll love you
Forever I'll stand
Nothing compares to the promise I have in You


My Jesus, My Saviour
Lord there is none like You
All of my days
I want to praise
The wonders of Your mighty love


Your my comfort (My comfort)
And my shelter(My Shelter)
Your my Tower of refuge and strength
let every breath
All that I am
Never cease to worship you


Lo Hwei Yen's chilling last seconds before execution

According to the transcript, one of the two attackers at the Nariman House Jewish cultural centre was told: "Brother, you have to fight. This is a matter of prestige of Islam.

"Fight so that your fight becomes a shining example. Be strong in the name of Allah... Brother, you have to fight for the victory of Islam. Be strong."

A separate call added: "Keep in mind that the hostages are of use only as long as you do not come under fire because of their safety.

"If you are still threatened, then don't saddle yourself with the burden of the hostages, immediately kill them."

The caller went on: "If the hostages are killed, it will spoil relations between India and Israel."

An attacker replied: "So be it, God willing."

Five hostages, including a rabbi and his wife, were later found dead with the two militants.


What the heck is this? God didn't ask us to fight violently against His own creation. I thought God wanted us to love one other....?




31st December 2008!


It was yet an memorable night of appreciation gathering with my closest spiritual family. Year 2008 has really been a great year. All of us has gone through rains&storms,trials& tribulations and challenges. By God's grace, we've made it here!


My mind wasn't immune to the fact that Year 2008 was going to end. It was just like any other day. As I was preparing the refreshment, all i could think of was to go else where after appreciation party. Nothing much was imposed until when we gathered together at the BBQ site. We were merry as we kicked off the day by playing guessing games. Never do I know that this was the last game I would be playing with the CG. Anyway, after around-about activity, shaun began to share a word with us about how we should end off 2008 well and move forward to 2009. He wanted us to remember 3 things,

1. Never to give up on OTHERS


2. Never to give up on YOURSELF


3. Never to give up GOD...

He gotten us to write down our most produest moments and regrets we had in 2008. Then Shaun began to share his most regrets to us. I guess Shaun could have had his own reasons,thus, I wouldn't blame him for it. I trully understand. And as far as he concerns, he, as a CG leader, decided to kneel before us hummbly to wash our feets, just like what Jesus did for His disciples.

" 2 years already hor? it's been so long... Lay Hwa, I really hope that you can forget every grudges and start afresh.You've been a faithful servant. Thank You... "

He wanted us to forgive and forget of all pasture we experience and start off afresh. I was very touched and I cried. I felt that I am not worthy for him to wash my feet. All the complains, rebellions, questioning, full of myself... ... But God is good, He forgives every sinner, like me... Thank You Lord...

1st January 2009!

*haiz*.... S.K flew off to Burnei for NS training. Felt so sad that I couldn't send him off. Anyway, I had a family lunch gathering with Granny. We were actually celebrating Granny's birthday in advance... Of all days they chose 1st Jan09.. *dotdotdotdots*.... Anyway, we enjoyed our time spent together. Happy Birthday 婆婆! :D

*寿包！Inside: EMPTY!!! >.<



















*At least inside got liangrong paste... :D
































*Noble House... ^-^
















*Mummy and 婆婆 so merry,however, auntie and uncle not happy... Favoritism! :D